Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
