Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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