So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
