Say something about gay babies.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
