it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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