Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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