Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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