I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
