Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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