i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
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