Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
