you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
