How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize