do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Boobs speak an international language.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
