Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
