you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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