Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
