Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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