new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
