wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
