What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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