it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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