if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
