So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
