We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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