i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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