im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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