Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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