I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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