I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
