Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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