she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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