Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
