i wish starbucks made bloody marys
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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