also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize