They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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