She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
