i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize