tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
