My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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