i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
