I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
