she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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