If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
