I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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