Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
