we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
