My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
