P.S. I can't hear my feet
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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