I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
