I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
